Posts Tagged ‘entertainmentcareers.net’

BREAKING NEWS: TMZ Looking For Tour Guides!

February 18, 2011

"...and to our left is the very tree that Lindsay hit about 2 hours ago."

TMZ, yes the gossip site, is getting into the tour guide business.

That’s right, now you can look like a total idiot being driven around Hollywood in an open bus by TMZ!

They’ve partnered with Starline Tours for a “revolutionary new experience aboard a custom-fitted bus” and they’re seeking tour guides that have “the gift of gab.”

They also want tour guides who know the difference between Minka Kelly from Mila Kunis (well, there goes my chance) and Mark Salling from The Situation.

Hey, I know the difference!

Mark Salling will still be around in a year.

Other requirements for the TMZ tour job:

– Must know where exactly to point out Lindsay’s enablers.

– Must know paparazzi broken English fluently.

– Must be able to get one of Charlie Sheen’s whores aboard the bus and strip.

– Must claim to have the exclusive on Lindsay’s next arrest, even though you  have no idea what you’re talking about and it totally contradicts what RadarOnline, People, and US are reporting.

– Must be able to explain to tourists why people would actually want to watch live video of Harvey and his employee what-his-face make commentary on TMZ.

*****

Willblogforlols is written for entertainment purposes only. THIS JUST IN: OK! magazine now getting into the dry cleaning business!

Andrew Wisot is a freelance writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and an US Weekly Fashion Cop who’s “between jobs.” Andrew will blog for LOLs until he’s employed again or 50,000 miles, whichever comes first.  

Don’t follow me on Twitter

 Email:  andrew@willblogforlols.com

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Paparazzi Wanted

January 12, 2011

As you can see, more photographers are needed in this field.

Have you always dreamed of becoming part of the paparazzi?

Well now’s your chance!

A well-established agency is looking for day and night photographers in the Los Angeles area. According to the ad, it’s “a great opportunity to be your own boss while developing a portfolio.”

However, there are a few requirements left out in the ad. For example:

– Must be able to tailgate celebrity at dangerous speeds.

– Must be able to greet star by saying, “Yo (star first name), what up?” fluently in an Italian accent.

– Must be unattractive. NO EXCEPTIONS!!!

– Must be able to flee scene of accident quickly after crashing car into star’s Mercedes.

– Must understand the only harder job in Hollywood is prying Vodka bottle away from Lindsay’s cold dead hands.

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Willblogforlols is written for entertainment purposes only. Starting a new book today called “The Rise and Fall of Hillary Clinton.” Gonna start it after boarding my plane.

Andrew Wisot is a freelance writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and an US Weekly Fashion Cop who’s “between jobs.” Andrew will blog for LOLs until he’s employed again or 50,000 miles, whichever comes first.  

Don’t follow me on Twitter

 Email:  andrew@willblogforlols.com

What do I do? I’m a Professional TV Watcher!

April 30, 2010

ATTENTION: potheads, high school dropouts, and overall lazy people!

Have you always dreamed of being a Professional TV Watcher?

Well, now you can!

For $8 bucks an hour, you can do what you do best: watch TV.

…and actually GET PAID for it!

Job requirements include:

– being able to pay close attention to – like – stuff with little supervision.

and…

– love watching TV!

And if you actually get fired from this job, sorry…you really are hopeless.

****

Andrew Wisot is a freelance writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and an US Weekly Fashion Cop who’s “between jobs.” Andrew will blog for LOLs until he’s employed again or 50,000 miles, whichever one comes first.

Email: andrew@willblogforlols.com